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Apr. 11th, 2005 | 05:28 am
mood: melancholymelancholy
music: Ella Fitzgerald - Can't help lovin' dat man


Divorced two years or so ago. Feeling a lot better, thanks. Made the irrational yet necessary choice not to know her anymore. No hard feelings, but it seems there's always going to be some pain there for me. In particular, she and her fiance are having a baby, and I feel the need to avoid seeing her pregnant.

She's getting married this weekend. It is oddly and selfishly reassuring to me that the lucky boy is someone whom I was fortunate enough to have formally "approved of" way back when. (Yes, "two years ago" is indeed starting to move into the "when I was little" frame of reference. Or as I was gently corrected this weekend, "when I was younger".) So anyway, no issues with the groom.

I wish them the best and I know they'll have a wonderful life. I'm invited to the wedding. They were even sweet enough to make sure it was okay with me that I was invited before inviting me. But I do feel that I don't belong there, even if I'm the only one that feels that's so.

Any reason I should go?

Speak now, or etc. etc.

P.S. - Oh yeah, and I guess all my friends are gonna be there. No, seriously. If I'm not going, I'd better make some other plans. I had originally planned to be away or busy, like, um, sorry, I'll be out of town, I had to wash my hair that month, or something.

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Comments {26}


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from: nobodobodon
date: Apr. 11th, 2005 01:55 pm (UTC)

Pro: Seeing friends.
Con: All that other yuck you mentioned.

You can see us some other time. You take care of yourself this weekend. Also the point someone made about your presence putting the bride in a different headspace, that's a non-selfish reason to skip it.

I miss you and look forward to seeing you soon, but not at such great expense.

Surely you have at least one friend not attending? If you have a car or can borrow one, you could take a mini roadtrip. Wildflowers are still out, and Enchanted Rock is always enchanting. And I hear there's really cheap tequila at this place just south of here. How long has it been since you've been through the Menil? Or been infected by medical waste washed up on Galveston?

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