telling me, that i won't be myself until i've really been alone.
alone as an adult that is. as a child i felt no alone because there
was no world outside my head for to be alone in. as a teen i was the
negative opposite of alone, a pariah. i'm older now, about as old as
i am likely to get.
so here i am. alone.
alone is much larger than i thought. larger than an
open alkali desert, larger than standing in the middle of the road
in the middle of the drag at four in the morning in the cool, damp,
air, every intersection flashing yellow, and there are no cars and
no people, saying to yourself there is no one else alive in the world.
alone is larger than your absence, larger than mine.
i am a fool to say it, since i am only visiting, this alone.
i have homes to return to, and soon, but. alone. for what it's worth.
alone and apart though i still feel you. yes, and you. you, too.
but you are not my problem
and i am not yours
i will build a fire in this alone
alone, warm, and cozy