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Untitled Poem, 2002-10-19, by Triple Entendre

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Oct. 13th, 2004 | 05:25 am

I was a kid when playgrounds were still dangerous
forged of cast iron
and flaking paint
warm from the sun
like you

spinning around fast and faster
the world blurs green and brown
and tries to throw you off

no one can get on again
until it stops
until no one pushes
for a while

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Comments {7}

valkyriie

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from: valkyriie
date: Oct. 13th, 2004 06:08 am (UTC)
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beautiful

enchanting

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Triple Entendre

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from: triple_entendre
date: Oct. 14th, 2004 03:14 am (UTC)
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thank you

it seems that things from my earliest memories make the best word-images

i loved those heavy spinny things

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valkyriie

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from: valkyriie
date: Oct. 14th, 2004 04:19 am (UTC)
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There is a snake like multiple people see saw that I've been eyeing for the last few years in peace park.

One of my favorite pictures is of my little sister on one of those spinny things. I'll have to show it to you some time.

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Miss Scarlet

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from: zuleikhajami
date: Oct. 13th, 2004 01:52 pm (UTC)
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I like that a lot!

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Triple Entendre

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from: triple_entendre
date: Oct. 14th, 2004 03:17 am (UTC)
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thank you!

I make art from a very young place
so it confuses me, kind of
to look at it when it's done
all I can say sometimes is
"I made a thing!"

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Kit

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from: todfox
date: Oct. 13th, 2004 07:53 pm (UTC)
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nice work. If you are looking for a title I would go with something simple like "Playground" or name it after the particular toy (merry-go-round?). this both brought back memories and left an emotional impression of it's own.

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Triple Entendre

Playground

from: triple_entendre
date: Oct. 14th, 2004 02:07 am (UTC)
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Thank you. Some very intense emotions went into its creation.

I won't do an exegesis, but I'll mention a couple of things that might be of interest:

- It's about a girl.

- It's not very nice.

Which is partly why it has gone untitled—the meaningful titles I considered all either constrained the poem or changed its tone. "Playground" fits perfectly, thanks. I will use that. (I had tried lots of the words that appear in the poem as titles, even "playgrounds", but as a title, the plural has a very different feeling and meaning.)

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